An inside job
Sometimes, when i'm observing Bruno ("look at those little white spots", "isn't his mouth something", "open your eyes, baby"), i'm suddenly startled with a clock telling me i've been staring at him for a full twenty minutes.

He's a week old today. At five to five in the afternoon, to be more precise. Seven days ago at that time, a long process of mixed emotions was beginning, giving way to an entire new life and a brand new feeling inside. Little Bruno stole my heart. From the inside.

Labour was difficult because it started one day before, and the pain of the contractions kept growing. I held Pablo's hand as he helped me breathe (how does one forget how to breathe?), telling myself it was all worth the while, still feeling the twists in my body and watching Bruno make his last moves in my womb. A long night.

I'll always remember the view from the hospital room. The quiet sounds of the street outside, on a Saturday afternoon, with a streamline of mountains closing around the horizon. How the pain was vanishing after the shot. How afraid and excited i was. The look on Pablo's face. His hair, all messy.

Bruno cried before anyone forced him to. I asked could i touch him, as soon as he came out and was placed on my stomach. "He is yours", she said. The transparent crib where he was washed and checked. The afternoon light flooding the room, against the walls. A river of tears. Smiles.

Introducing Bruno



Here he is. I don't really know what words i should use to tell you about our baby Bruno, because there are so many. I could say it was amazing to finally meet him on a gorgeous Saturday afternoon. I could say we have never been happier. I could maybe tell you about the way he smells. But i don't think words are really necessary right now. Here he is.

Spitting images


Above, a collection of some of my favourite pictures at Flickr. Most of them are from strangers i happen to run into while sailing the web, others are from our wedding day and the rest are pics i like, taken by friends and family.

However, there is one called Helen i've recently added both to this collection and my desktop, also known as "you're not getting any more sugar, hon" that makes me crack up each time i see it. She is the spitting image of funny rage. I wonder what one does when your toddler slips into that face. But i'll worry about that later. In life.

* Updated: Coming Up Next

Being here

Our place: I like our new home. I enjoy it. I love watching how it slowly takes shape around us. The views are something else. Birds constantly fly by our living room windows and tides of light rush into the house. We haven't painted yet, but there are some pictures on the walls, decoration touches and new light switches so it's starting to feel like our place already.

Ready: Baby's room is the most complete in the house. It has a star-shaped lamp, a crib, a cot, a cozy environment. There is also a backpack on the floor, ready for the hospital. I feel a little eerie about the closeness of birth. I've been buying and watching and researching and reading and wishing and worrying and getting all excited. And now i just feel strange. I guess it's just a pinch of respect, a wince of fear.

San Lorenzo: As for the town, i'm quickly adjusting to life outside the hassle. It's easier to adapt when you have the kind of time i get in my hands and i stroll around, go to the Thursday street market for fruit and vegetables, take my 'breathing' lessons with other future local mums. It's funny: In a way i feel safer living further away from the centre. Safer from what, i couldn't really say.

Morning lights: Because of the tsunamis of light invading our bedroom and the material our curtains are made of, i'm rediscovering early mornings. This may also be strongly connected to my pregnancy changes. I leave the bed every two/three hours at night. I wake at six, seven and eight. Sometimes i get up and have coffee, taking the stillness of the moment in, and then i resume sleep elsewhere. On the couch or later in the morning. It's soft and calm here.

Kitchen talk: After that, the day starts growing older and i make myself 'survival lunches' such as sandwiches and pasta, to indulge later into some elaborate cooking for dinner. I'm learning a lot. And i think i'm getting into the swing of things, little by little. My new obsession is to get a proper dinning table to have friends and family over. And because my back is starting to get into a question mark shape with all those tv tray dinners.

City muffin: Not that i don't go 'into the city'. I jump down there at least once a week, to keep up with the urban pace, to shop, to see friends. Like last Sunday, when i rode into the ol' neighbourhood of Malasaña to brunch with Kurt and company for his birthday. If felf great to be there. It's just like having the best of both worlds. By the way, that place Nina has the best muffins ever. It beats Starbucks.

I'm a beach ball



So today was supposed to be my due date but a doctor disguised as a Dwalks clone decided, after running a couple of tests, that i'm a full week behind. Baby has no name and hardly a due date. Son of Ambivalence...

I look like i swallowed last summer's beach ball but i'm doing ok. Sometimes i wish i could feel more useful but i guess that's just the unemployment status building inside me. I work around the house and my cooking skills are improving (apple pie or vegetable and cheese quiche, anybody?), and that keeps me happy enough.

I can't remember the last time i wrote something over 100 words but at least i'm back at reading (Tom Wolfe's I Am Charlotte Simmons, loving it) and listening to music: mostly radio still but slowly getting back to the cds. I don't know where the anticultural momentum came from, it may have to do with the pregnancy hormones or something.

It's been about two months since we moved into this new place and i find my life adapting, adjusting, reinventing itself with the house. I'll tell you more about it tomorrow. And Kurt's birthday brunch, of course.

Moving from the winter into spring
This is what the views from our new home were only a few days before we settled in. It was freezing cold, as you can see, but it was gorgeous. That was a hard week for us, with all the pressure, the packing and the tiredness but now, when i look around and see the house, the space, the mountains and the sunny life, i breathe in and out and take it all in. It's happy.

First things first



"Liam is no longer Baby's name. We realized it's hard for some people to pronounce it in Spain so we're changing. How does Bruno sound to you?". Read the rest here.

Guess who's back... back again.